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  • Jayne Green (B.Ed;M.Ed)

21 Steps to Happiness: How to Manage Anxiety and Depression

Time for Change


(Print this and put it on the loo door).

1. STOP- being fearful of the future because you don't have any control of what will happen tomorrow.

2. STOP- being angry, forgive and move on. For example, if someone has left you but is the father of your children and didn't abuse you in any way, try to see that the relationship can still be one of harmony. You can still share the children, be kind to each other and be friends. Hate and Spite only keeps us stuck in anxiety and depression.

3. STOP - focusing on your broken relationship and what the ex partner is doing. This is just torturing yourself. Just remove them from your Facebook page so you know nothing about what they are doing until you are over the pain.

4. STOP - focusing on the negative thoughts when they appear. You can choose to ignore these and just let them pass through without paying attention to them.

5. STOP - regretting and feeling guilty for past mistakes. Yes, you made mistakes - who hasn't! Just learn from them and move on.

6. STOP - worrying about what others think about you. You are wasting precious time because they are too busy with their own lives to be focused on you and what you said or did.

7. STOP - thinking you aren't good enough! Replace these negative thoughts with good thoughts about yourself. You are good enough! You are just damaged by others and life challenges that have made you feel inadequate. Time to start thinking you are wonderful.

8. STOP - Let go of toxic friends and toxic relationships, even if it means relatives that are bringing you down.

9. STOP - feeling you have to please everyone! If you don't want to go somewhere and you prefer to stay at home, just say so! It's OK to say NO!

10. STOP - making the same mistakes over and over again. Start thinking about how these mistakes impact on you and then don't repeat them. Be smarter and wiser.

11. STOP - Choosing the same relationships that keep you stuck. Choose a life partner wisely and those who you want in your personal space and life.

12. STOP - Patterns of behaviour that keep you stuck. Recognize these and stop repeating them.

13. STOP - Copying your parents behaviours that were either toxic and/or impacted on you. Recognize them and change.

14. STOP - and Take time to Relax- you deserve time off. You weren't put on this earth to do everything for everyone and to put yourself last.

15. STOP - make changes to the things that are stressing you out. Your career, your relationship and/or your every day life and stresses.

16. 0STOP - Making excuses about exercising and eating healthily. Both help heal anxiety and depression and also prevent diseases and a early passing.

17. STOP - Reacting angrily. Count to 10 and walk away, and come back when you are calm. Anger impacts on the heart and your health.

18. STOP - Hating! Hating only impacts on your health and will cause health problems.

19. STOP - Abusing substances to mask your pain. Instead get help and therapy.

20. STOP - feeling guilty as a parent. Do your best but remember parenthood is learning as we go. There is no handbook.

21. STOP - feeling guilty and instead say sorry to those who need to hear it, so you repair relationships that were impacted due to your own mistakes - e.g. mistakes as a parent that we have ALL made at one time or another.

Jayne Green (B.Ed; M.Ed)


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